By Guardian, Shona Reid
For many of us who work in the out-of-home care system – we say we care about the voices of children and young people.
But the truth is, we’re still in charge of the microphone. We still assume we know best. We still do the talking. And they’re still expected to nod and adjust.
At this year’s SNAICC National Conference, myself and three young women with lived experience of the care system, Jasmine, Kim and Miah, encouraged people to flip the script so young people are leading conversations and decisions using a tool known as “reverse mentoring”.
Reverse mentoring is about turning our systems inside out and asking ourselves the hard questions: What if we don’t always know better? What if the people who’ve lived it have something to teach us that our degrees, our policies, and our good intentions never could?
In reverse mentoring, instead of speaking for that child/young person, the adults sit, learn and reflect on what needs to change based on what’s been shared with them.
Imagine this:
- A 16-year-old young woman, who’s lived in five placements in three years, sits across from the director of a care agency. For the first time, she’s asked: What would you have wanted someone in my role to do differently?
- A 20-year-old care leaver mentors a senior policy officer, sharing what it was like to leave care with no bank account, no safety net, and no sense of what adulthood should look like.
- A group of Aboriginal children and young people mentor government staff on cultural safety – not as trainees or workshop attendees, but as respected knowledge-holders and truth-tellers, leading the room.
When a child or young person is given the opportunity to mentor an adult – to share their insights, and have those insights genuinely listened to – something starts to shift.
They begin to see their story not just as something that happened to them, but as something that can create change for others.
It tells a child or young person their voice has value and restores their sense of control, purpose and dignity.
It reminds them that they are more than their case file. They are contributors. Knowledge holders. Change-makers.
For adults, the benefits can be equally transformative – if we’re willing to open ourselves up to them, it can deepen empathy and interrupt some of the assumptions we didn’t even know we were holding.
It shines a light on blind spots, and gently or powerfully asks us to reconsider the way we work.
It brings us back to why we came into this work in the first place – to walk alongside children and young people, to help build better futures, and to make sure they don’t have to fight so hard to be heard.
When children and young people’s insights are embedded into decision-making, services become more relevant, more responsive, and more human.
It’s no longer just about performance indicators or compliance; it’s about relationships, trust, and real outcomes.
Organisations that embrace reverse mentoring often find themselves becoming more reflective, more transparent, and more willing to change course when something isn’t working.
It creates a culture where feedback is welcomed, not feared – where leadership means listening as much as it does directing.
We can keep doing things the way we always have – adult-led, top-down, consultative but not collaborative – and continue to wonder why things don’t improve. Or we can try something different.
Start small. Start today. Start with one young person. Ask what they wish adults understood. Let them lead.
Because when we learn to see the world through their eyes, we start to imagine a different kind of future.
Read the full discussion paper here.
