As we celebrate Foster and Kinship Carer Week, a young woman who has written a book about her foster care experience is calling for carers to receive better trauma and mental health training.
For more than nine years Felicity Graham moved around in the foster care system, looking for a foster home she could call her last, with a family who would accept her for who she is. When she found the one, she finally felt a sense of belonging and knew she was loved and cared for. But when her mental health deteriorated after a year, her carers were not equipped to deal with and provide her with the necessary support and so the placement came to an end.
“During my time with my last foster family, I felt safe enough to let my guard down and express my thoughts and feelings. Unfortunately, my family didn’t know how to cope with my mental health and behaviours as a result of this and sadly I had to leave,” Felicity said.
Upon leaving the placement at the age of 16, Felicity decided to write a book to help her process her experiences and to help other young people in foster care know they are not alone.
“Not Held Down is my story of life in foster care. It is about letting other kids in care know there are other people experiencing the same thing they are. Often kids in care feel silenced and have no place to turn to. My book aims to help them find their voice, to teach them there are people out there who are willing to listen.”
Felicity’s story also tackles the challenges within the foster care system and what she thinks could make it better.
“The system needs to change,” Felicity said. “It is evident carers need more training and 24/7 support to cope and manage trauma and mental health. They need to understand the trauma many young people have experienced prior to entering their home and how this affects the young person’s life, especially their mental health.”
“We already know there are not enough foster carers for all the kids out there needing a home so this too needs to change. It would also be great if more social workers were available to better support young people in care – just knowing someone is available for us any time we need them would make a world of difference.”
“I don’t need to save the world, but if I can be an advocate for change and help at least one person in care then I will be happy,” Felicity said.
Felicity is looking to finish high school next year and wants to complete further studies to become a youth or social worker. She also aspires to have her book made into a movie, ideally featuring Dwayne Johnson (aka The Rock).